My dentist (lord willing, I hope he never sees this) loves to yap. (I hear this is true of most dentists, especially when they’re working in our mouths.)
But he doesn’t mindlessly ramble during our appointments. Instead, I’ve noticed there’s a specific type of conversation that keeps him grounded in the present. Every time he tells me about something he’s looking forward to — a vacation, weekend plans, time with his favorite people — he completely lights up with an excitable energy and a smile.
Maybe the secret to being present is anticipating something that you can share with others. Because time well spent now might depend on how expansive we think the time we have truly is.
It appears I’m not alone in thinking about this recently. Jason Feifer wrote about three kinds of joyful anticipation in his newsletter this week following post-vacay blues. I love this quote from the issue: “So we must constantly give ourselves that gift of anticipation, so that there is always something to look forward to, and always something to work towards, so that we never feel like we’ve reached the end.”
I’ve started asking people — family, friends, coworkers — “What’s one thing you’re looking forward to, personally or professionally?” (This is actually one of my favorite questions to use when kicking off a workshop because no one likes forced icebreakers!)
The answer doesn’t matter. Whether it’s something big or small, personal or professional, is irrelevant. The point is that it draws attention back to the current moment and reminds us to keep going as we think about what’s next.
Some might argue that thinking about the future is a distraction from today. But maybe presence isn't the absence of anticipation. Maybe we build presence on top of anticipation. That’s what I’m sitting with this week.
Anticipation is Joy in Advance by Patty Freedman
After 5 p.m. it’s Friday on Vanderhacks by Laura Vanderkam
All those moments throughout the days, weeks, months that don’t get marked on calendars with hand-drawn stars or little stickers. Those are the moments that make a life.
I’m Alyssa Towns, and this is TIME INTENTIONAL, a newsletter exploring what it means to spend our limited (and precious) time intentionally in honor of Janet, Dale, and John.
Read more about the meaning and memories behind each section of the newsletter!
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