The quiet signs of value misalignment

You can’t be intentional without knowing your values.

I know. Identifying and living by your values isn’t a novel concept. People often discuss this topic. Here are a few pieces of value-related content I’ve enjoyed recently:

• “The happiness we’re searching for rarely comes from bigger numbers. It comes from doing work that’s aligned with our values and having space for relationships and experiences that give our lives meaning.” —Justin Welsh, The Saturday Solopreneur

• “Szuplat said that before you can get people to believe in you, you have to believe in yourself. And in order to do that, you have to understand where you come from, what you truly value, what you believe in, what you stand against, and what your goals are. You also need a clear vision of the future you’re building if you want your audience to come along for the ride.” —Renee Lynn Frojo, A Good Reputation

• “Our greatest regrets are rarely failures to reach our goals. They’re usually failures to uphold our values.” —Adam Grant on X

• “Who you are is defined by the values you are willing to struggle for.” —Mark Manson on X

I believe in the power of spending time soul-searching to uncover, align with, and prioritize your values. But we make it seem like living a value-aligned life is easy when it’s usually far from it.

I’m not perfect at it, either, but rather than tell you to live by your values, I’ll offer another approach that has helped me realize when I need to make a change: pay attention to the signs of value misalignment.

We might think we know what our values are and what we need, but we don’t always get it right. And when we don’t, there are (almost always) signs that tell us otherwise.

While value misalignment feels and looks different for everyone, here are some indicators you can watch for:

These aren’t true for everyone, nor are they always the result of value misalignment, but I always turn inward when I notice one or more of them consistently.

Recognizing these signs within myself has helped me:

• Trade my value-misaligned corporate job for time freedom and freelancing

• Have tough conversations with superiors at work and stand up for myself

• Develop friendships with people I feel secure around who share similar values

• Structure my days (and my life) in a way that feels authentic to how I want to show up

I know how difficult it can be to sit in the confines of your mind and ask, “What do I truly value? What matters most to me?”

Perhaps that’s not always the best way to determine what we care about most. There’s equally as much wisdom in knowing yourself well enough to understand what you don’t care about, what doesn’t feel right to you, and how you don’t want to feel.

Value misalignment is like being planted in the wrong type of soil. Sure, you’ll survive, but you might wilt and miss an opportunity to bloom and reach your full potential. But your roots know who you are and what you need. Listen to them.

Time Well Spent: Weekly Roundup

1. We made our first meal with an ingredient (spinach) from our garden! I used to glaze over moments like these (always in a rush, busy, busy), but this week, I sat and savored it. Ask me what I put in my salad. It was incredible!

2. I recently joined Lex Roman’s Legends community subscription and am participating in a Loose Ties Scavenger Hunt of sorts. This week, I had to find one Legend whose work I wanted to read. Some of them are Time Intentional readers (hiii, Kara D. at Wishful Working!). Let’s just say there will be no shortage of incredible reads in my inbox anytime soon. (By the way, Time Intentional fell into “The Soul Searchers” category per Lex’s roundup, assisted by Claude. I love it.)

3. I shared a LinkedIn post about how writing is evolving and how I’m enjoying a shift away from strictly SEO blog posts in my work to a more varied, creative approach, incorporating other types of writing. It was nothing but blatantly honest ramblings from me, but it resonated with many. Honesty wins.

The Takeaways

• What’s one small action you do daily that you can savor this week that you typically blaze through?

• What is someone else’s work telling or showing you that you want to explore or express more of in your own life?

• Identify an opportunity to be ruthlessly honest with yourself, a small group of people, family members, or social media. Now go and say or write what you need to. How’d it feel?

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I’m Alyssa Towns, and this is Time Intentional, a newsletter exploring what it means to spend our limited (and precious) time intentionally. Extend your love and support by sharing this newsletter with someone you know or buying me a coffee! ☕

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